The aim of meditation is not to escape feeling.
The aim is not to push emotion underground.
You meditate to bear witness to your emotions without judgement.
Only by knowing them can you avoid succumbing to them in ways that might hurt you or cause harm to others.

Officials downgrade Hurricane that is heading towards Hawaii.
Hurricane acknowledges, nods, and proceeds to calm the fuck down.
Way to go officials.

You say you are free
But darling, your heart has an
expensive price tag

They didn’t fight very often.
It wasn’t because they didn’t want to, however.
Anyone who knew them growing up would tell you
"The boy was ruthless"
"She was a force to reckon with"
But they didn’t fight very often
They were too good at it, you see
The twisting of the words
The strike at the core of the matter
They could weave whatever bullshit came their way
In such amazing ways, you would of thought it was
All your own doing
They didn’t fight often because neither could win
They had found their match
They knew better than to let things sit
Because things that sit are things that grow
And things that grow are simply fuel
It was in their best interest to not fight
Because they were in the business
Of tearing people apart

So often now, the
Worlds I think I am making,
They are making me

my favorite thing
is the smell of rain, just as
it begins to fall

Reading is not a chore.
So many times I hear, I don’t read enough. I should read more. I need to do <A> because I haven’t read enough today. No. What you should be doing is always be on the look out for books to read. This is more important than reading them even. You are looking for one that makes sense to you, that will work with you, something that feels like a puzzle piece that you’ve been missing for far too long. There are infinite ways you may find this book, and you must be open to them all.
Because once this good book has grabbed you, then you don’t need to worry about reading anymore. You need to worry about where all the hours have gone because this book has consumed you. It dominates every thinking moment of your life and demands your attention. Work, play, driving, all of these things are no more compared to the monumental work that is the book. You will tear through this book. That is what you must look for.
So stop worrying about how much you are reading.
A plant doesn’t worry about how much it is growing, it is always looking for the sun.

Stare into your tea
notice the little swirls and eddies that drift just under the surface
in a strange but simple choreography
I want to be a current in a cup, moving always going nowhere
I want to be the dark green
I don’t want to be here

How should I know why that is? I want [her]. It’s a - it’s a kind of madness, except that I think it’s the best kind of insanity. I’d be mad not to have that kind of madness - I don’t expect you to understand.

Asimov